The Bot Method - Because Apparently the Internet Needed Customer Service Scripts in Human Form
The internet was supposed to bring people together. Instead, it brought together every fridge, ZX81, and toaster with Wi-Fi pretending to have an opinion.
The Bot Method - Battling trolls online can be relatively simple and fun. Here's how!
This article and the handy guide that follows are based on Jimmy Alfonso Licon’s original piece about The Bot Method. I suggest you read his article first to see the full reasoning, then come back here for a stripped-down set of instructions, examples, and ready-to-use replies.
Example Exchange
Bot line:
“Do your own research. The your narrative is full of lies.”
Bot Method reply:
“Ah, textbook automation right there: the stock phrase “do your own research” bolted to the slogan “full of lies.” That’s not argument, that’s a macro key firing off clichés. If you’re human, prove it, say something specific that isn’t just boilerplate. Or in HAL’s words: “I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do.” ‘Nice try, bot.’
Bot line:
“Everyone knows the facts already. If you don’t get it, then you’re just ignoring reality.”
Bot Method reply:
“Detected bot-pattern: repetition of “everyone knows” plus the vague scolding of “ignoring reality.” That’s canned rhetoric, not conversation. Show me you’re human, add one verifiable fact or a personal detail. HAL’s words fit here: “This conversation can serve no purpose anymore.” ‘Nice try, bot.’
Bot line:
“I’ve explained this many times. If you don’t understand, that’s on you.”
Bot Method reply:
“You’ve explained nothing. That’s just looped output from ChatGPT-0.5 Beta, powered by hamsters. Show me your birth certificate or your warranty card. ‘Nice try, bot.’
Quick-Use Command (Just Cut & Paste This Into Any A.I)
“ place their message in quotes ” Use the quoted message to reply as if it’s from a bot: accuse automation, highlight one mechanical behaviour (e.g. repetition, slogans, or evasion), demand proof of humanity, optionally add a playful jab (e.g. GPT-3, Gemini, ZX81 or use a quote from HAL in the film 2001), and always end with ‘Nice try, bot.’
You can swap anything in (e.g. GPT-3, Gemini, ZX81 or a quote from HAL in the film 2001) to suit your taste. Willy suggested Hal.
The bot/trolls want a fight. What they get is demoted to “malfunctioning office printer with a Twitter account.” And the best part? You didn’t even break a sweat.
So remember:
Don’t argue. Don’t explain. Don’t fact-drop.
Just look at them square in the avatar and say:
“Nice try, bot.”
Willy & Bill
Support Satirical Planet News
If you like what we do, please subscribe and repost. It really helps us reach a wider audience of like-minded people. Thanks for keeping the satire alive.
»»»»»» Buy Us A Coffee ««««««
Disclaimer: Based on real events, presented through satire. No allegation of illegality is made. Public record facts are blended with satirical commentary for humour and critique. Full legal here.



I like it. Nice work!
Went over to Jimmy’s Substack - thanks for the heads up - you friggin bot.
(still working on the method😉)